Denyse Wilcox
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No More Courthouse or Registry Office "I Do's"

7/27/2020

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Every couple has a different idea of what their ideal wedding ceremony should be. From the ceremony script itself, to the venue, flowers, number of guests. I have been fortunate enough to have performed the role of celebrant at large weddings in beautiful settings as well as small intimate ceremonies held in couples homes or backyards. All of these occasions have felt special to me and I know they have been special to the couple and their friends and families.
Some couples, as I did myself many many years ago, choose a registry office or courthouse wedding.
Well things have changed - registry office and courthouse weddings are no more. For those of you who were considering this option dont be disheartened. The good news is you can still have a registry wedding just not at the registry office or courthouse. Instead you get to choose from a registered celebrant who holds a special approval from the Registrar of Marriages to conduct these ceremonies. These approved celebrants have a validation from the Celebrants Association of New Zealand,(VCANZ), to be able to gain this approval.
The cost to you of the licence is $150 paid direct to Births Deaths and Marriages and $90 paid directly to the celebrant you choose.

I was thrilled to be approved to conduct these weddings and am available for bookings anywhere from Pukerua Bay to Foxton. The advantage of this new system is that you can get married at your home, the beach or a park of garden or other venue and there is no guest limit.
If your interested in finding out more please give me a call on 0212137834 or contact me via this page.

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Getting Married COVID19 - Level 2

5/11/2020

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Isn't great to see that New Zealand is getting on top of COVID-19 and moving to Level 2.

As of this Thursday the 14th of May 2020, you can continue to get married with no more than 10 people in attendance. I know some of you will be disheartened that the numbers who can attend are not higher. The Government has promised that if things continue to go well, they will expand the numbers who can attend weddings. There should be an update about this toward the end of this month.

So as from Thursday, no more than 10 people can be present. This includes the couple getting married and any vendors such as the celebrant and photographer.

You will need to make sure you practice safe distancing and pay extra attention to good hand washing and sanitising. You will also need to keep a record of all attendees (full name, address and a contact phone number) for contact tracing.

You will need to take responsibility for letting people know that if they are unwell, are in isolation  or showing any symptoms of COVID-19 then they are not to attend.

One thing that has changed is that you will now be able to celebrate with food and drink after your ceremony. But remember that you can only have 10 people max at any after function. Why not book a restaurant meal for your table of 10 or head home with your guests for a private gathering? Note that gatherings are limited to 2 hours duration.

My advice is keep planning and lets get you hitched when the time is right for you to have your wedding day your way. In other words, if you have dreamed of a big wedding with everyone you love and more in attendance then don't schedule until the future is looking a lot clearer on the COVID front. If however you are on a budget or small and intimate is more your style, why not go for it now!

You can  order your marriage licence online at https://marriages.services.govt.nz/. At the moment you should allow at least a week for the licence to be issued.

Why not get in touch and see how we can work together to create the ceremony of your dreams?

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Weddings and COVID 19

4/17/2020

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 Today I should have been heading into Houghton Bay, Wellington to conduct the wedding ceremony of a beautiful young couple from Otaki. They, like a number of  other couples I have been working with, have had to postpone their wedding. When the international borders started to lock down, their wedding was hugely impacted as close family from overseas would not be able to attend.

COVID 19 has changed the world as we know it and who knows what the "new normal" will look like or when we might get there.
I did offer all the couples who have postponed a small legal only ceremony pre-lock down to be followed by the full works post lock down, but they all chose to defer. 

These events have been so disappointing for the couples. They have put their heart, hopes and dreams into planning their special day. They have waited not only for this celebration of their love and of making the legal commitment to each other in marriage but for also getting to share all of this with the important people in their lives.

But putting it into perspective is also important. Firstly, its a crappy, windy and wet Wellington day so today's couple can hope for better weather when they reschedule! Secondly for all the couples who have postponed - you will have your day, you still have each other and your love for one another and by following the lock down rules you are playing a huge role in stopping the spread of this terrible pandemic.
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A little advice if its helpful:

Marriage Licence
If you have had to postpone due to COVID 19 you can get a refund for your marriage licence as long as you apply for the refund during the valid period of your licence which is 3 months.
Simply send an email to bdm.nz.govt.nz and head your email : Request for marriage licence refund.
Provide both parties full names and address and the reason you are requesting the refund.
When its closer to the time for your wedding to proceed, you can apply again.

Vendors
Check your contractual agreements with vendors before contacting them. I am hearing on the grapevine that most vendors are really happy to renegotiate a new date at no extra costs as long as they have not incurred costs already. For example if your cake maker had your cake ready to go and you postponed, the cake maker has still incurred expenses in ingredients,power,staff costs and time so it would be unreasonable to expect them to refund your money or provide a new cake on your new date at no additional cost. If however you, had paid a deposit for the cake and the cake maker had not incurred any costs and was refusing to allow you to change your date and refund your deposit, well that would seem a little mean spirited! 
While this is how we make a living, most of us recognise that these are unprecedented times and irrespective of what our contracts say we want to be responsive.
For the couples I am working with, we are negotiating new dates and I'm really flexible about that as long as  your  new preferred date has not already been booked.

Can we get married now?
Level 4 has specific rules and unless you are all in the same bubble - celebrant, 2 witnesses and couple getting married then weddings should not be going ahead.

The Prime Minister announced this week that under Level 3  which is the next step down level, couples may get married as long as there are no more than 10 people present - this includes the Bride and Groom, guests, and any vendors such as the celebrant and photographer.
In addition, under Level 3, there is to be no reception or serving of food and drinks and the rules of good hygiene and social distancing need to be applied.

A Virtual Celebration
The reality is that it will be some time before we can travel freely throughout New Zealand and even longer still until international borders are open. If you have important people who cannot attend in person, how about organising to live stream the wedding? I'm a celebrant, not a tech expert, but I do know that there are some fairly easy to use options available for live streaming and actually asking a young person or tech savvy friend is a great place to start.
For free options check out Facebook Live, Instagram Live and YouTube Live.
You can use a smartphone or tablet or laptop.
A few hints though:
  • Use a tripod if you are using a phone or set up other devices on a stand or surface to prevent movement.
  • Make sure participants all know how to access the livestream - this may require some assistance for some people to download the app.
  • Check that the location of your wedding has a strong and reliable signal and if the venue does not have free wifi make sure you have plenty of  data available on your device.
  • Do a test run before the ceremony to make sure you have time to fix anything  e.g can people connect, is the device in the best position.
  • Be clear with international participants about the timezone.

Bookings
While we are at the tail end of wedding season, there are still a large number of weddings that have had to be postponed across the country. If you have not rescheduled - please do not leave it too long as your vendors will be trying to fit you in along with those couples getting married in the 20/21 wedding season.
To my existing couples, I hope you will do something special on the original date to celebrate your love. Don't forget to keep in touch as the situation we are in continues to evolve. For those of you who don't have a booking who might be interested in meeting with me, I am available via Facebook messenger, Zoom, or Microsoft Meetings. There is absolutely no obligation and I wont be offended if you do not choose me -its so important we click as we will work together to create your ceremony.
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Stay safe and well
​Denyse
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